Wednesday, May 22, 2013

Who Doesn't Love A B-Lowe Story?

Last night, B-Lowe and I were on the lawn holding our giant goslings.  Emphasis on 'giant'.  I forgot I put a pot of asparagus to steam on the stove.  Emphasis on 'forgot'.  By the time I remembered, the entire house was full of a pungent odor, and I burned the bottom of my pan.  

When B-Lowe came into the house that night, I could hear him all the way up the stairs shouting, "Ohhhhh!  Whaaaaat the?!  What happened?"  

"I burned some asparagus on the stove earlier", I explained.  "I tried to open all the windows but it filled the house."

"Oh!  Come on!" B-Lowe continued.  "HOW could you?  It smells like a Vegan burned to death in here!!!!"

Dear Lord, please make my Vegan sister too busy to check my blog today.  I'll worship you at your feet forever, and adopt a child from Calcutta.  Amen.

Meanwhile, at the grocery store...I found these chips which seemed a perfect fit for B-Lowe and I.  We both love popcorn, we both love chips....

They are gluten-free for him...

Full of salt for me...

Neither do they contain meat or dairy products.  Kosher, to boot!  When I showed them to B-Lowe and presented the positives of the popcorn chips, he thought they sounded disgusting.  Despite my finesse, his last words on the subject, were,  "I'm not eating them now, or EVER!"  He was right, they aren't the best.  

Just now, B-Lowe called me from an undisclosed location.  "I need you to go out to the truck and get a part number for me under the hood....he, he."

I was on it!  "How do I open the hood of the truck?"

"Find the handle next to the emergency brake."

"Is that on the driver's side or the passengers side?"  

He didn't respond.  I love messing with him.  I pulled the handle and pop, goes the weasel.

"Now," he continued, "look for a yellow handle where the grill is and push it down, and the hood should open."

"Open!"  I shouted with exhilaration!

"REALLY?" He asked in skepticism.  ", look on the right side for a number above three plugs."

"SVH8" I said.

"Okay, so, 'Snake', 'Victor', 'Horse', and the number 8?"

"Sure!"  I said.

"Well, is that correct, or not?" he asked.

"I don't remember, I closed the hood of the truck already."

Silence.  Crickets mated.  Frogs ribbeted.  I'm not certain, but I think I heard the sound of soft sobs coming through the phone. 

 Ain't my fleurs purdy?  Squirrel!


  1. It's SHV7, btw, fyi...

  2. Ha ha ha! I couldn't remember cause I closed the hood, remember?


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