Tuesday, May 21, 2013

The Professional & The Vegan

Birthday party lassoing, continued.  

Allow yours truly to show you how it's done, partners!  

Slip your rope through the small loop at the end of the lariat called the honda. Form a noose approximately one to two feet in diameter.  Very helpful if your capable brother is around to do this for you.  

Hold the loop lightly in your right hand a foot or so from the honda. Coil the rest of the lariat in your left hand leaving 5 to 6 feet of kink-free rope between the noose and the coil.  Wear jeans, turquoise earrings and a denim jacket for maximum affect.  Thank you.

Position yourself in front of a target.  Try not to think about your lower belly fat being exposed when extending your left arm.  Next time, wear a longer shirt.  Be grateful a dark color covers your upper arms.

Relax your wrist and slowly begin to swing the rope over your head, right to left. Expert ropers like my dad suggest thinking of your wrist as an axle and the lariat's loop as a wheel revolving horizontally over and around your head.  If the rope accidentally hits you in the eye, it's normal.  If your mom is there, she will get you a Tylenol and a bag of ice.

Cast the loop by swinging your arm quickly forward. As you move your arm forward bring your wrist down to shoulder level and extend your arm out. Be careful not to interfere with the motion of the lariat. Let your palm open and swing the loop toward the target. 

You may or may not want to wear a sports bra.  You may or may not want to invest in an "hombre" hair style, because it looks amazing in pictures.

Strive to send the noose on a straight, level course to your target by maintaining a smooth steady rhythm as you cast. Keep your arm and wrist straight and extended toward the target. The force you use to thrust the loop forward will also play a role in how far your lariat goes.

Pull the length of lariat coiled in you left hand to tighten the loop around your target.  After a few tries and making myself NOT focus on my stomach fat in the moment, I was a pro.

Next, this thing shows up to the party.

My cutesie, punky, tiny, smarty-pants kid sister.  No meat or dairy products could be found within her intestinal tract at any time.

She is a Vegan and momma of 2 boys ages 4 and 1.  Therefore, she is skinny and does not get winded going up or down stairs...

Or swinging a lasso.  She does not worry about stomach fat, because non exists on her body. 

She's always had what you call "control".  When we were kids, my mom would stop at Taco Bell on the way to Ganny & Grand dad's farm.  Mom bought each of us a bean burrito.  She only ever ate half of hers and I ate mine, plus the remaining half of her food.  

She did it!

She's the best thing that ever happened to me, but, we don't talk about it.  

Her first born came and hi-fived her success.  Can you stand the cuteness?  I grab him and kiss him as often as possible.  He's not allowed to wipe off his cheeks until I turn away.

By the way, she didn't need a sports bra.  Just throwing that out there.

Fast forward to today: I went back to the gym and I have began a Vegan diet.  

Which will probably last 3.5 hours.  

I'm trying to think nuts, fruits, veggies, oatmeal and Boca patties.  I need prayer...

And maybe a 4 year old and a 1 year old to run after.

That's where he comes in.  I'm just speaking from my heart and my reproductive system.  That made no sense.

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